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The author of this article is also the
author of the Online Dating Kit materials advertised above.
Am I Weird If I Date Online?
By Devlyn Steele
True story: A few years back I was working with a client who
had recently moved to Los Angeles. She was single, did not know
many people in the big city, and felt a little lonely. I innocently
suggested she give online dating a shot. It seemed like an easy
and pressure-free way to meet people, and I had other clients
who enjoyed their experience and were in good relationships as
a result.
"What kind of desperate person do you think I am?!?"
she snapped.
She apologized, but explained that she felt weird
about online dating. This perked my
curiosity, so later I asked some of my other clients if they
ever tried it. Some only confessed after their faces turned three
shades of crimson. Since I am a strong proponent of online dating,
I dispel any stigma or embarrassment when I recommend it to my
clients. This is what I tell them:
For many singles, life moves like Richard Petty around the Talladega
Speedway. We change jobs every few years. We relocate more frequently.
We cannot remember the last time we answered a phone with a cord.
Even if time is not the issue, some single people cannot shake
the feeling that everyone else is happy while they are always
alone. We may look at online dating as an act of desperation,
because normal people dont need something like that.
The simple fact is that you are not weird if you use an online
dating service. We only feel weird when we think we are doing
something outside the norm. Consider this: over 40 million people
in the US access online dating websites every month. It is the
fastest growing sector of online content. There is no reason to
feel embarrassed, because if you date online you are actually
part of a huge group.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone special,
or at the very least make some new friends, so why not use every
resource available to you? You do not get extra points for meeting
someone in a bar or while waiting for dry socks at the Laundromat.
Does it matter to you how you met the important people already
in your life? You probably barely even think about it.
By setting up a personal profile and a list of likes and dislikes,
you invest time in yourself. More importantly, you are taking
action by trying to improve yourself and your situation. You are
putting yourself out there and taking control by refusing to be
lonely and isolated.
I have found many advantages to the Internet. The anonymity of
online dating allows you to roll out of bed, hair standing in
ten different directions, breath smelling like Boston Harbor at
low tide then click! You stumble on a person you will be
dating in a few weeks. The cost compared to going out and searching
is next to nothing. You can learn more about a persons interests
to see if they mesh with yours. You do not have to deal with the
harshness of rejection in person. You have a huge pool of people
to explore (remember, 40 million!) from all walks-of-life, people
you would never have the chance to meet within your neighborhood
or small circle of friends.
There is also fraud and deception. You will probably come across
a photo that looks eerily like Pamela Anderson right down
to the copyright in the lower corner. Clients tell me about married
people posing as single. Nevertheless, these issues of honesty
exist both on and off-line, so do not let that stop you from finding
the partner you want.
With 43% of the U.S. population being single and with so many
single clients asking me about Internet dating, I began to put
a guide together to help my clients use this service effectively
and safely and avoid these pitfalls. I want everyone to find the
happiness they deserve and want to make this Tool book available
to everyone for Free! To get your free E-Book, Tools To
Internet Dating go to TheRelationshipTools.com and get your
copy today.
Dont be ashamed or afraid, learn the best and safest way
to use the Internet to take control of your life and find the
person you deserve!
About The Author
Devlyn Steele ("America's Leading
Life-Coach") has been a public consultant and a private counselor
for over 15 years. A Cognitive Therapist, Radio host and Columnist,
Devlyn also developed ToolsToLife.com. Devlyn maintains a thriving
practice in Hollywood, where he counsels famous actors, musicians
and captains of industry. Soon his new book will be available,
Relationship Tools. You can hear Coach Steele live every Tuesday
on LoveBeat Radio 1310 KXAM.com 7-9 PM. Arizona Time
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